there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
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