sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Randomize
