Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
