hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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