the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
