Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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