adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
