Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Randomize
