You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
