I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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