well you can't waste a boner
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
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