wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
