On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
