Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
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please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
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You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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