i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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