Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize