well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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