i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
