she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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