we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize