i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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