Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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