i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
