I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
