So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize