I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
