Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
