let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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