Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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