the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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