Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
