Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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