i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
