Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
