thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize