thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
