what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I can't put those talents on a resume
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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