Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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