Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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