Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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