cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
