i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize