I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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