I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
He did a backflip because drugs
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