anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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