Grow some girl-balls and come out already
birth control should be required to get into college
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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