i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
