i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
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