The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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