my phone cant type all the emotion im having
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You made out with two different species that night
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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