Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
