But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
