I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
