I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
